Professor Radwan
10-19-2006, 10:40 PM
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* When a woman says “Yes” that means “ No “
* When a woman says “No” that means “ Yes “
* When a woman says “Maybe” that means “ No “
* When a woman says “I'm sorry” that means “ You'll be sorry"
* When a woman says “We need” that means “ I want “
* When a woman says “It's your decision “that means “ My correct decision should be obvious by now “
* When a woman says “ Do what you want “that means “ You'll pay for this later “
* When a woman says “We need to talk “that means “ I need to complain “
* When a woman says “Sure go ahead “that means” I don't want you to “
* When a woman says “I'm not upset “that means “ Of course I'm upset, you moron “
* When a woman says “This kitchen is so inconvenient “that means “ I want a new house “
* When a woman says “I want new curtains” that means “ carpeting, furniture, and wallpaper “
* When a woman says “I heard a noise “that means “ I noticed you were almost asleep “
* When a woman says “Do you love me? “that means “ I'm going to ask for something expensive “
* When a woman says “ How much do you love me? “ that means “ I did something today you're going to hate “
* When a woman says “I'll be ready in a minute “ that means “ Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV “
* When a woman says “You have to learn to communicate” that means “ Just agree with me “
* When a woman says “Are you listening to me!? “ that means “Too late, you're dead “
• When a man says, “ aha” , “ sure, my dear!” or “yeah, honey”, that means “absolutely nothing” because it is just a provisional answer.
• When a man says, “may I help you to fix dinner?” that means “ why dinner has not been served, yet?”
• When a man says , “that will take a long time to explain,” this means “ I don’t exactly know, and have no idea how to do it. “
• When a man says, “ I was listening to you very carefully, but I was just handling an important paper here. I’ll finish it and give you my full attention, honey!” that means, “that girl standing on the street corner is very beautiful !”
• When a man says, “have a rest, honey ! you have been working hard and look tired,” that means, “ I can’t hear the end game’s signal while this **** sweeper is turned on. “
• When a man says, “I was thinking of you at that moment so I bought you these flowers,” this means “ I couldn’t resist the beauty of the girl who was selling them.”
• When a man says, “what else did I do this time?” this means “ what did you exactly find out?”
• When a man says, “you know I can’t love anyone but you,” that means, “I’ve got used to the way you are shouting, and sure you can do worse. So all I can do is to give up.”
• When a man says, “you look great and wonderful in this dress!” this means, “don’t try another one, please! I’m starving.”
• When a man says, “don’t be afraid. We have not got lost, yet. I know exactly where we are walking,” this means “no one will ever see us alive in this world again.”
* When a woman says “Yes” that means “ No “
* When a woman says “No” that means “ Yes “
* When a woman says “Maybe” that means “ No “
* When a woman says “I'm sorry” that means “ You'll be sorry"
* When a woman says “We need” that means “ I want “
* When a woman says “It's your decision “that means “ My correct decision should be obvious by now “
* When a woman says “ Do what you want “that means “ You'll pay for this later “
* When a woman says “We need to talk “that means “ I need to complain “
* When a woman says “Sure go ahead “that means” I don't want you to “
* When a woman says “I'm not upset “that means “ Of course I'm upset, you moron “
* When a woman says “This kitchen is so inconvenient “that means “ I want a new house “
* When a woman says “I want new curtains” that means “ carpeting, furniture, and wallpaper “
* When a woman says “I heard a noise “that means “ I noticed you were almost asleep “
* When a woman says “Do you love me? “that means “ I'm going to ask for something expensive “
* When a woman says “ How much do you love me? “ that means “ I did something today you're going to hate “
* When a woman says “I'll be ready in a minute “ that means “ Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV “
* When a woman says “You have to learn to communicate” that means “ Just agree with me “
* When a woman says “Are you listening to me!? “ that means “Too late, you're dead “
• When a man says, “ aha” , “ sure, my dear!” or “yeah, honey”, that means “absolutely nothing” because it is just a provisional answer.
• When a man says, “may I help you to fix dinner?” that means “ why dinner has not been served, yet?”
• When a man says , “that will take a long time to explain,” this means “ I don’t exactly know, and have no idea how to do it. “
• When a man says, “ I was listening to you very carefully, but I was just handling an important paper here. I’ll finish it and give you my full attention, honey!” that means, “that girl standing on the street corner is very beautiful !”
• When a man says, “have a rest, honey ! you have been working hard and look tired,” that means, “ I can’t hear the end game’s signal while this **** sweeper is turned on. “
• When a man says, “I was thinking of you at that moment so I bought you these flowers,” this means “ I couldn’t resist the beauty of the girl who was selling them.”
• When a man says, “what else did I do this time?” this means “ what did you exactly find out?”
• When a man says, “you know I can’t love anyone but you,” that means, “I’ve got used to the way you are shouting, and sure you can do worse. So all I can do is to give up.”
• When a man says, “you look great and wonderful in this dress!” this means, “don’t try another one, please! I’m starving.”
• When a man says, “don’t be afraid. We have not got lost, yet. I know exactly where we are walking,” this means “no one will ever see us alive in this world again.”